- submitted by s.levenstein on 10/30/2009
Florida ... Soon To Be Swimming With The Fishes?
By Steve Levenstein
Anybody see that news flash about how the Tampa area is going to be underwater by the year 2100? Anyone? Bueller? Like so many global warming articles, this one too seems to have slipped beneath the radar, which is really too bad since it seems that someday they'll be slipping beneath the sonar.
That's right folks, the Great State of Florida is in the same state as a leaky garbage scow: already low and getting even lower. And Florida IS low -- it has no mountains; in fact the highest point in the entire state (Britton Hill, at 345 feet) is lower than the highest point in Washington D.C. (Tenleytown, at 429 feet). Britton Hill is the lowest state highpoint in the nation and it's barely even IN Florida. Anyone heading for "the hills" had better aim for the tip of the panhandle; or maybe just turn on the TV.
The point is, Florida has got the most to lose from global warming and nobody seems to care. Not in Florida; not in the country at large. If you've seen the film An Inconvenient Truth or any number of animations depicting rising sea levels, one thing stands out: Florida is going to be history. Pretty much the entire state is gonna be swimming with the fishes and this time, we can't blame the mob.
Now I've got nothing against Florida or Floridians, just the opposite. My parents winter in West Palm Beach along with a lot of other so-called Snowbirds. They own a condo there as a lot of folks do. That's gotta be worrisome. Seriously, if I knew my digs were destined to be prime ocean-bottom real estate by the end of the century I'd be renting, not owning. Yet condo complexes are still finding buyers and there hasn't been any outbreak of fire sales... so far.
Those who think Port St. Lucie is the new Venice had better consider this: Venice doesn't get hurricanes. Someone had better bring this matter to President Obama's attention because as even Glenn Beck knows, he's capable of anything. Florida's fate is indeed worthy of presidential concern -- it's the 4th most populous state in the nation.
Even more important, and how to put this delicately... Florida is, er, America's ding-dong. You know what I'm talking about, look at a map. Sea level rises high enough and guess what? So long ding-dong. A catastrophic castration, the emasculation of America! That's the kind of change no man (or woman) wants to believe in!
So, am I just being Chicken Little here? Do the placid, sun-dazed Floridians know something I don't? Do they perhaps have a plan for the somewhat soggier future that awaits them? It had better be a good one - growing tails and gills only works on Futurama. There is one silver lining to this ominous cloud, however... come Hell or high water, the Dolphins, Marlins and Rays won't have to change their names.
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Steve Levenstein was born & raised at the then-northern edge of metro Toronto, Canada. Looking through the prism of the suburbs has not only given him a slightly skewed view of society, but has also helped frame the wider world as a series of variations on a theme. Closer to home, Toronto's multicultural mix acts as a rich, vibrant tonic -- an essential elixer that, by putting people out of their place, highlights the common humanity which lies within.
After a 15-year dip in the corporate pool, Steve abandoned the daily commute to focus on his first love, writing, and spending time with his family. Steve's wife of 18 years hails from Tokyo, Japan, and provides a unique window into the delights and diversions of modern Japanese culture while his 2 sons (the younger an established tech blogger in his own right) help keep the house from getting too quiet. Steve writes for a number of respected blogs including InventorSpot, WebUrbanist, Dark Roasted Blend and The Thinking Blog...read more rants
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