Overheard in the Burbs

Fool, I'm Trying To Sleep

Guy 1: Ever wonder why you get snow sometimes and frozen rain other times when it's below freezing.

Guy 2: (yawns; it's 6:30 a.m.)

Guy 1: What about sleet? Even hail.

Guy 2: (leans head back on bench)

Guy 1: Then...

Guy 2: Can you please shut up.

Ivy League Alternative: Home Schooling?

Woman 1: Thinking of home schooling Laura.

Woman 2: Laura? College Laura?

Woman 1: Yea, Dartmouth

Woman 2: What...?

Woman 1: All they do is party. I swear, no different than Miami.

Woman 2: They're smarter, though.

Woman 1: Yea, she gets drunk with smart people. She throws up in smart peoples' toilets. Go Ivy League!

Michael Jackson Death Sparks Confusion Among Music Buffs

Woman 1: Michael Jackson...

Woman 2: Sad. But he died musically decades ago. His last good song was...1999.

Woman 1: That was Prince.

Woman 2: (pauses) You're right. It wasn't Michael. It was Lionel Richie.

Woman 1: No, it was Prince.

Woman 2: What was Michael's?

Woman 1: The one where he looked like a zombie and danced around the stage and everybody thought he was brilliant.

Woman 2: Ben. No, Bad, maybe.