 |
|
 |
B-Tales Episode 5- added on 04/17/2007Pass The Chips, DipRick walked into the room, and saw no poker chips or decks of cards or bags of Doritos on the table. Fled was drinking a diet root beer and some other guy he didn't know was drinking a Snapple, "Where's the beer?" Rick said. Fled smiled uneasily. A man in a white shirt and yellow tie stood up and extended his hand. "Thanks for coming, Rick." Rick said, "I come every couple weeks. Where's the poker game?" "We decided to defer it a little while," Fled said. "Rick, we'd like you to run for Mayor." The man in the yellow tie was still standing. The other men also wore ties. Rick was wearing a black T-shirt with an abstract image of Jerry Garcia on it. The table, in a conference room in Fled's offices -- usually the game was at someone's house; should've been a tip off, Rick thought -- was laminated mahagony. "I don't have a job, bud." The man smiled. "Philip. We know. You're what we're looking for." The man slid a sheet of paper on the table toward Rick. Rick picked it up. "The unknown dangers of porto-sans?" Rick said, reading from the page. "Your first platform," the man said. "Environmental hazards . . ." Rick said, "they use no water . . ." " . . . . and the urinals, next to the toilets, look like sinks. People, our kids at the parks, at their games, wash their hands in them, use that wax deodorizing bar as soap . . ." "Are you crazy?" Rick said. "We'll pay you," the man said. His white hair was thick and shellacked in place. "To do what?" Rick said. "Very little." Rick watched the man, who sat down. Fled was reading something on his lap. It looked like a power tools catalog. The others at the table were watching the man. "Why don't you run?" Rick said. "People don't like me. They like you. That's what we hear. We think the town can use you." Fled nodded, looked up at Rick hopefully. "I say we play some poker," Fled said. The man smiled and pulled up from the floor a wooden box of poker chips, and a large grocery bag filled with junk food. "Where's the beer?" Rick said. The man pulled up an ice chest, smiled, opened it and passed around dripping cold bottles of Iron Horse Lager. Rick looked at Fled, a look that said, I'm going to kill you, unless, maybe not, unless I win big tonight. Fled seemed to get it, and nodded. He angled the throat of his beer bottle toward Rick, a toast. Rick swigged the beer, noted its strong taste, and ignored Fled....read more Rick and Fled   YES!! - submitted by Anonymous on 04/17/2007
Another great story...good work Burbia! Finally, a new episode. - submitted by Readers on 04/17/2007
Finally, a new episode. We're big fans her at U of Vermont. Keep them coming. Go Fled! I'm in love, Fled reads - submitted by Fledfan on 04/17/2007
I'm in love, Fled reads power tools catalogs. That's all I need. We're hoping Rick will run - submitted by Vermonter on 04/17/2007
We're hoping Rick will run for higher office, not just Mayor. Does he have a girl friend and what happened to his wife? Not Rick, I want Fled in - submitted by Fledfan on 04/17/2007
Not Rick, I want Fled in national office. Anyone who enjoys power tools magazines belongs on a national stage! Thank you. This is warped - submitted by R&Ffan on 04/17/2007
Thank you. This is warped and I like it. LOL What's really with the guy - submitted by Anonymous on 04/17/2007
What's really with the guy in the yellow tie? A metaphor, I bet. I really liked this one, one - submitted by bigfan on 04/17/2007
I really liked this one, one of the best. Wonder where it's going, seems meandering and I like that about it. But I'd also like to know more about the characters. They seem almost real, but not quite, and I think they can be. I'm starting to get hooked - submitted by reader on 04/18/2007
I'm starting to get hooked on these 2 nuts. But you have to do new ones faster so we can stay involved. What happened with the weed whacker race? I just finished this. Fun - submitted by yea on 04/18/2007
I just finished this. Fun fun. I hope Rick runs for mayor. Actually, wish he'd run for mayor in my town. He sounds cute and completely unambitious. Just the right resume. really like this now. it's - submitted by Anonymous on 04/19/2007
really like this now. it's growing on me. the porto-san issue is hilarious. hope you take that somewhere wild. My daughter used the - submitted by Anonymous on 04/19/2007
My daughter used the porto-san wax bar as soap once and I was mortified. I know this is humor and all, but the urinals in porto-sans do look like sinks. At least there should be clear signs in them. I know people who have washed their hands in them. If you know people who wash - submitted by ohmygosh on 04/19/2007
If you know people who wash their hands in the urinals, they've got bigger cognitive problems than a sign would solve. Come on. A friend of mine told me she - submitted by laughing on 04/19/2007
A friend of mine told me she almost used the urinal wax bar as soap too. We girls aren't used to urinals, you know? I'm going to urge our local officials to make this a big campaign platform too. No more porto-sans!!! Everyone should have to - submitted by ohmygosh on 04/19/2007
Everyone should have to bring their own bars of soap and towels to the park. That's my new campaign platform. Let's bring it to Waashington. Not perfect, but carries me - submitted by Critic on 04/20/2007
Not perfect, but carries me along. What I like is the attitude that comes through in everything. It's a distinctive voice and I have to aqdmit I'm looking ahead and hoping a new one comes out soon. A friend put me on to this. - submitted by readerwriter on 04/22/2007
A friend put me on to this. I just read all of the episodes and really like. Love the odd voices, almost cartoons but not quite. Looking forward to the next installment! WHEN'S THE NEXT EPISODE. WE - submitted by Bigfan on 05/03/2007
WHEN'S THE NEXT EPISODE. WE WANT TO THE NEXT EPISODE NOW PLEASE.  |
|
but the rest of the guys, none of whom he knew, were drinking nothing.
.frontpage.jpg){kind=small}