Guy 1: She's driving me insane.
Guy 2: I hear you.
Guy 1: I get home, she wants me to sit with her on the sofa and talk. I go into the den, turn on the computer, do anything else, she has a fit.
Guy 2: How long does she want you to talk?
Guy 1: Like 15, 20 minutes, I don't know.
Guy 2: (shakes head) Jesus.
Guy 1: I know. (pauses) What do you think I should do?
Guy 2: Talk.
Guy 1: About what?
Guy 2: No idea.
B-Take: We heard this exchange on a commuter train home, sitting across from these jokers, scribbling frantically while they spoke, trying not to laugh while also trying our best to get all the words right.
Our take? First, of course, we find the exchange amusing. But our message to the wingnuts guys....go back to your eff-ing frat.
We know, it's not always easy to talk to your girl friend or wife, especially right after getting home from work. You want some down time. You want to chill. So do we. (News flash, so does she, when she gets home from work.)
But 15 minutes too long for you? "No idea" what to talk about? (And, what, you really think your partner would object if you sometimes asked for a little decompression time right when you get home?) Look, and we don't mean this disrespectfully, we find it hard to believe anyone waiting at home for you really would want to spend 15 minutes listening to anything coming out of your mouths. Unless, say, it's your dog. (It is, isn't it?) Who hasn't been fed all day and then the extent of her interest, we suspect, would probably be hearing you opening up the dog food cabinet, placing the bowl on the floor and leaving.
Assuming (hypothetically) you are married or living with a real person...the real question is, in getting married or moving in, you were thinking what? More great sex more regularly; less talk? Either you're stupider than wood or you thought the person you're living with is stupider than wood.
Either way...congratulations. If you keep an open mind and try a little bit to empathise with your partner's needs -- and act like a person who's graduated middle school (note we say "act" because it's prettly clear you guys didn't...graduate) you might have a shot that your partner won't leave you within the month.
Rarf! ...overhear more