You're probably wondering: How can I afford a new house in this economy? The question you should be asking is: How can I afford NOT to?

At Platinum Century Realty, we think the time for your new dream home is NOW. Look at the fine properties we have available throughout the area:

Stephen Kling is a grizzled veteran of the advertising wars...read more

DEEP DEW CLOSE: (3/4 bdrm 2.5 bath Colonials, .33 acre lots). Just 20 miles outside the outer limits of the bucolic exurb of Spit Crossing, which is itself a mere 45 minutes from the terminus of the Greenhaven Metro Commuter Railroad and its pleasant 65-minute train ride to the central business district, is this idyllic meadow community.

Wide open spaces, vistas to forever, each Deep Dew Close abode is designed with you in mind. Exclusive illegal-Mexican-crafted kitchens with stainless steel appliances grace a new, generous open-layout home replete with occasional moldings, and authentic floors that, upon completion of the latest architect-inspired renovations, will stretch all the way to elegant white gypsum walls.

Due to the recent civil unrest in Deep Dew, granite countertops are everywhere, even in the master bedroom, throughout the seemingly limitless front yard, and protruding through the Pella© Bay Window now innovatively positioned in the his-and-hers drive-through closet.

There's real value for the smart buyer who moves fast; most of the damage to Deep Dew Close (referred to as Deep Dew Foreclose by the local wags) has been expertly repaired. There was never a better time to make one of these previously beautiful domiciles yours!

BIRDIE BOTTOMS: (Golf Condominium Community). Imagine waking up every morning to the sounds of songbirds and "Fore!" This is the place for you if you love golf, and who (aside from hate-crime anti-golf activists) doesn't love golf? Golf Today Everyday Magazine says that even though fewer and fewer people have time to bludgeon beautifully-manicured lawns to death for hours at a stretch, golf is on an "upswing." Why should you doubt it for a minute?

Birdie Bottoms offers top-of-the-luxe 2, 3, or 4-bedroom homes overlooking the area's newest 36-hole golf paradise consisting of three championship courses with their own different sparkling personalities to tickle your putter. Homes on McAllister Crook feature unbreakable plexiglass windows and double soundproofing so the incessant curses of sub-optimal players can hardly be heard.

Indian Tears Ridge, erected on ancient burial grounds of the Algonquin Nation, features Tudor-styled homes with ball-catching rain gutters that can help you collect dozens of errant golfballs and paving stones as they sail overhead, thrown by protesting Native Americans exercising their ancient territorial rights.

And residents near the Iwo Jima 18 will be happy to note that their homes are fully armored with Kevlar shingles and 3-inch steel plate to ensure that dinner is never interrupted by long-drive shrapnel!

That's not all. Every Birdie Bottoms condo residence comes equipped with an indentured Filipino caddy, thoughtfully chained to an Arnold Palmer Ball Washer, as well as anti-personnel Taser fencing designed to keep roving golf parties of drunken Wall Street traders from attacking your women. Ready to tee off? Then call soon!

PONTIAC PARK: (Luxury Mobile Living). Even the value-minded
homeowner-to-be can find a bargain at Pontiac Park. Here, the developers have taken design cues from classic American style makers to create the ultimate in mobile luxury life.

Snuggle up with your family in a plush 1978 Oldsmobile Delta 98, with power-everything -- once you get the silky-smooth V8 to run. Or, if you're more of a salt-of-the-earth Man's man, set up housekeeping in the vast expanse of a Ford F-250 Crew Cab, complete with intermittent running water that flows naturally every time it rains, and ample storage available where local artisans have skillfully removed the entire engine block.

But Pontiac Park is more than a collection of fine domiciles; it's a community, too. A well thought-out site plan includes a clubhouse area under a cathedral-like, arching 40-foot highway overpass, providing shelter from wind and elements throughout the seasons. Cleverly placed radiant heat receptacles recycle waste from the local environment, and residents enjoy gathering around them to share news and opinions of the day.

Nights are full of excitement, too, as Pontiac Parkers continue to socialize over drinks, melodrama or occasional violence. If you've ever admired the paintings of Breugel the Elder, or the post-apocalyptic visions of "Mad Max"or "Planet of The Apes," Pontiac Park will feel like the home you've long been searching for. Act now for the choicest building lots!

No matter what your economic or social strata, Platinum Century Realty has a hole home for you!...read more blogs