- submitted by L. Keenan on 10/21/2008
Autistic or "Fat, Lazy and Stupid?"
By Linda Keenan
As I read and re-read in disbelief the latest outrageous quote from actor and, um, "humorist" Denis Leary, I recalled a father on a talk show a few years back trying to hold back his uncontrollable sobs when talking about his autistic son. The man wanted only one thing from his 10-year-old son: for him to simply say "Dad." And I think there should be a special place in hell where Leary lives in eternity waiting for his own kids to be able to say Dad, but they never can.
Here is the quote from Leary's new book, Why We Suck: A Feel-Good Guide to Staying Fat, Lazy, and Stupid: "There is a huge boom in autism right now because inattentive mothers and competitive dads want an explanation for why their dumb-ass kids can't compete academically, so they throw money into the happy laps of shrinks...to get back diagnoses that help explain away the deficiencies of their junior morons. I don't give a s--- what these crackerjack whack jobs tell you-yer kid is not autistic. He's just stupid. Or lazy. Or both."
Lazy, stupid, wait, is the child fat too? What a cut-up. By the way, I first came across the quote on a website for parents with kids who have behavioral issues, you know, that's where we inattentive mothers while away the day talking about our fat, lazy, stupid kids.
Now Leary has tried to defend himself from the well-deserved fusillade of criticism, by saying the quote was taken out of context, that of course he believes "real autism" exists (note that he uses the word "real").
The chapter the quote is found in is called "Autism Schmautism," and Leary says this:"The bulk of the chapter deals with grown men who are either self-diagnosing themselves with low-level offshoots of the disease or wishing they could as a way to explain their failed careers and troublesome progeny."
I actually hope Leary believes his argument, which is apparently that autism and its "low level offshoots" are being vastly overdiagnosed. Because if he doesn't, and this was a naked bid to sell more books, well, that's simply reprehensible. Obviously, his publishers knew this was the book's' "holy sh*t" quote, as we used to call it in television, and that's why it was "leaked" to Page 6 of the New York Post, a few days before the publish date.
Since the book wasn't on shelves when I wrote this I can't look it in context as Leary suggests so I'm perfectly willing to stand corrected once I see it. But I would be very surprised if that could explain away the nasty obtuseness of these words. There's enormous pressure on authors to be provocative, but I would think that Leary went a little beyond that. Does he need the money or the attention? No, which suggests to me that he believes it.
So let's look at the argument. Sometimes in the case of the 10 year old boy who can't say dad, it's a no-brainer. He has autism. In less severe forms, it can be more amorphous, but even if it were true that the autism spectrum disorders are being overdiagnosed, what does it matter to Leary? And what expertise would he have to make this judgment? Because he's not a fireman but he plays one on TV?
Having a child has been a wonderfully humbling experience for me. I can't believe I ever said a word about parenting practices before having a child myself. Now I see clearly the pressures on parents to do what they believe is best for their kids, and never being quite sure they're doing the right thing.
I can't imagine having the temerity to judge a parent who might be struggling to figure out if they are dealing with autism or an autism spectrum disorder.
I'm home with my son full-time so I spend countless hours observing kids with and without special needs. I think the more time you are around kids, the less apt you are to judge any parent. But Denis Leary's been pretty busy since he had his own kids. Maybe he hasn't been as "attentive" as he thinks he is.
Linda Keenan is a contributing writer at Burbia. Linda worked 7 years as a head writer/senior producer for various programs on CNN. Before that she worked as a writer/producer for Bloomberg TV. She now writes satire, primarily about parenting culture, at Thoroughly Modern Mommy...read more rants