B-Rant

- submitted by J.Glarsten on 10/08/2009

In The Matter Of... WTF, Your Hot Coffee Is Actually Hot!

By J.Glarsten

Saw this sign at my coffee shop the other day. It wasn't there last week. It's placed around the hot coffee station. You can only get to this station after you've intentionally ordered, paid for and received the cup for your hot coffee. It's not just a warning -- it's a how-to...for whom? Imbeciles? Coffee drinking 3-year olds? Oh wait, no...a-holes who retain lawyers.

Two weeks before, there was an incident. The owner calls it "the incident before".

A woman, a regular, spilled some coffee on her arm and screamed bloody murder. I was there. She was simultaneously on the phone and using her blackberry -- and yelling at her kid -- while pouring herself the coffee and putting on a lid. It spilled. It probably hurt her arm for a second. She went rip-sh*t. Bad day? Bad life? Pond-scum opportunist? She threatened the staff, the owner; she threatened some of the customers -- like me -- who urged her to calm down. Actually she slapped me on the shoulder. It hurt. (Hmm...that gives me an idea.)

A week later, according to the owner, he received a letter from a lawyer. The woman had retained a lawyer. Because she had spilled her own coffee. The owner showed me the letter. (He wouldn't let me copy it.) The lawyer letter -- headlined, "In Re Matter Of Regretable Coffee Incident And Negligence At Café..." - threatened a lawsuit. It demanded damages, and fair "compensation for pain and suffering and bodily injury". It reserved all rights, "including without limitation the right to punitive damages, equitable relief -- [what would be equitable, hanging this idiot from the ceiling by her PDA case strap?] -- and any damages deemed fair and just by the court of competent jurisdiction."

The owner says he first thought it was a joke from a friend. It wasn't. The lawyer wanted a meeting. The owner got his own lawyer. His own lawyer said it was ridiculous -- no sh*t -- but you have to take these things seriously. He advised the owner to warn customers in advance about the hot coffee. The owner thought that was a joke. It wasn't. The warning is this new sign. (It actually doesn't seem so new, lots of stains, etc; but maybe that's the intended effect, or maybe the owner in a rage spilled coffee all over it himself. Or, it came from somebody's basement or warehouse, like the lawyer's, because I can't see the owner going out and buying one.)

The woman has actually returned to the coffee shop, to buy coffee. The owner's lawyer advised him to continue to serve and treat her like a regular customer and, for example, not to poison her or empty a vat of scalding pig fat on her head while she stirs the sugar.

But the owner has refused. He's stationed a kitchen person at the front door and, if she shows up, he asks her to leave. The first or second time (maybe more), she refused. She came in and was refused service. She yelled, made a few threats. Customers yelled at her, a lot more loudly, and she left. The lawyer says it would be better if the owner played nice. The owner says, f*** that. Most of us agree (though we're not lawyers...thankfully).

Conversations between the parties are ongoing. The owner says he will go out of business before paying her a cent. Maybe after I sue her for assault -- now that I think about it, my arm and shoulder are really stiff...in fact I can barely move my neck, and my limbs, all the important ones, feel numb... -- maybe then she'll withdraw her claim and compensate the owner in the only way reasonable...by never showing her face again in the coffee shop and getting the help (from a shrink, doubling her meds, whatever) she obviously needs.

Meanwhile, we've got instructions on how to pour and cover our coffee cup. I particularly like the first part -- place one hand around the cup (as opposed to both hands?) and the 2nd hand on the lid (because if we place both hands on the cup, hmm, we'd have to use our foot on the lid?...). I know, I get the point. Sad and crazy. And too common. ...read more rants

• Get it off your chest

Looking for wealthy men for dating or marriage?

- submitted by Anonymous on 10/09/2009

Looking for wealthy men for dating or marriage? Maybe you want to check out ====WealthySeeker.COM====, which features certified millionaire and verified beautiful women.

Wow

- submitted by Chuck Beeno on 10/09/2009

OMgosh dude aint it the truth! Well done!

CHuck

RT www.true-privacy.net.tc

Once worked at a macdonalds.

- submitted by noonegotmyname on 10/09/2009

Once worked at a macdonalds. Saw a very drugged up woman purchase a chocolate sundae. While holding it, some of the fudge dripped on her hand. She complained, said it was too hot, etc. I facepalmed.

America has become a fucking

- submitted by Anonymous on 10/09/2009

America has become a fucking cesspool.

When are we going to fight back people?

The United States "Justice" system is the laughing stock....

- submitted by Dear Lord on 10/09/2009

of the world.

Law suits

- submitted by Anonymous on 10/09/2009

What is it with the judicial system in America that has one and all can sue a person -- and is awarded -- with millions of dollars for a minor mistake or injury which is one's own fault? Why do judges and juries award such crazy amounts? My family in the States has to sign a waiver that they will not sue the neighbors each time their kids go play next door. Crazy.

How do we fight back?

- submitted by Flabbergasted on 10/09/2009

That's the question, isn't it? How do we fight back against the ridiculousness that grows every day in our society? It's not only in the legal forum that it can be seen, though that is one of the more publicized places.

If anyone has any real ideas about how to smack some sense into the American society, I'm sure we'd all be glad to hear them.

haha i read that comment as

- submitted by Anonymous on 10/09/2009

haha i read that comment as "America has become a fucking cesspool. When are we going to fight black people?" I know that's bad, but i lol'ed at least for a minute.

HealthCare

- submitted by Anonymous on 10/09/2009

This shit doesn't happen in Canada, because everyone's covered universally for healthcare. There's no lawsuit if the damadge to you arm costs you nothing. yet another benefit of the 'socialised' medicine that half of you folks seem to be against.

hot coffee, Who'da thunk it?

- submitted by Anonymous on 10/09/2009

My cousins from Germany came to visit me here in the States. They went to McDonalds one day and got a coffee. They were amazed that there was a warning label that stated that the coffee was hot. They said of course coffee is hot, what else would one expect ? Welcome to America the nanny state and home of far too many lawyers.

your shoulder

- submitted by Eli on 10/09/2009

Actually, if she made contact with you, it's battery. Assault would mean that she put a reasonable fear of imminent contact with you by her actions. Seeing as she actually made contact, with the intent of it being harmful and offensive, it could be both assault and battery.

She also might just be a batshit insane moron. Where is this coffee shop, by the way? I generally make my own coffee, but this sounds like the kind of business I want to support.

wow i cant believe that

- submitted by canadian on 10/09/2009

wow i cant believe that people are trying to make money off there own mistakes. sometimes commen sense aint so common.

shout out to the Cafe, hold your ground.

National Accident Insurance

- submitted by Dan on 10/09/2009

New Zealand has a publically funded accident insurance program. It automatically pays out compensation and covers medical expenses of anyone undergoing an accident. There are no accident or malpractice lawsuits in this country and it prevents ridiculous shit like this from happening. Americans aren't idiots, they're just opportunists. Very difficult to distinguish sometimes.

Two words. Sounds like...

- submitted by Old Rubberlegs on 10/09/2009

There's a simple, elegant and "pretty good" solution to this kind of thing:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Loser_pays

I have a few suggestions as

- submitted by Austin on 10/09/2009

I have a few suggestions as to how to make lawsuits like this less common.

One way to curtail this is to make awards of attorney's fees easier to obtain. Consider: A sues B for "negligence," and loses. B moves at the end of trial/summary judgment for the full amount of its attorney's fees. A then not only doesn't get any money from the lawsuit it initiated, but has to cough up what will probably be a couple thousand dollars to compensate B for having to defend the lawsuit. This could provide a powerful disincentive to bring stupid lawsuits.

I don't think we should have a per se rule (i.e. every loser pays winner's atty fees) but making it easier to get atty's fees by motion would, I think, go a long way to curtailing this type of thing.

Grow up

- submitted by Jeff on 10/09/2009

"This shit doesn't happen in Canada, because everyone's covered universally for healthcare."

Are you serious?!? Only an idiot would think the answer to this is socialized medicine. I guess it's true...you can't fix stupid.

@ Eli

- submitted by Austin on 10/09/2009

You an attorney? Your analysis of battery and assault was pretty dead-on-point.

i can't beleive judges don't

- submitted by digg reader on 10/09/2009

i can't beleive judges don't see the extent of the injuries and throw the cases out. i mean, whats next, sue the city for tripping on the sidewalk and scraping your wrists? i mean, i can understand sueing for damages and injuries when you are at a buisness an somthing happens as a result of thier negligence like that woman who fell between two train cars because they forgot to put a connector to walk on and lost both of her arms and half of one leg. but seriously. it was HER OWN FAULT she spilled coffee and the judge should give her a fine for abusing the taxpayers system to try and get compensation for somthing that is clearly her own fault. GIVE HER A HEFTY FINE and give some of the money to the cafe' owner for having to endure the threats of being sued

and about Canada...

- submitted by Anonymous on 10/09/2009

In Canada, you can't sue for more than the actual and foreseeable future damages that result from the action. We don't have "punitive damages" that result in large awards. If you can't prove it, you can't claim it. We don't allow awards "just 'cuz we think its bad".

In this person's case, in Canada the most she could get as an award would be the cost of cleaning clothes (assuming she won in the first place). The only "punitive" amounts that may arise result as fines, paid to the government and not the "victim", if the business was found to be negligent or in violation of some kind of safety code or standards. Based on this account, I don't see that as the case.

The other risk this woman would run is that the judge decides its a nuisance suit, and that she and her lawyer are wasting the court's time. Then she could end up having to pay full costs of the defendant, and if there's a pattern to this, her lawyer could be censured by the appropriate law society (disbarment is possible but highly unlikely).

I would also expect that the assault and battery would be a criminal matter (you don't "sue", you press charges). Again, here it would violate the Criminal Code, and you could approach the police. I would expect they'll try to talk you out of it, though, since no permanent damage was done, there may not have been criminal intent, and the woman may have felt threatened by the crowd its own behaviour, as well-intentioned as it might have been.

Problem Solved

- submitted by Anonymous on 10/09/2009

Re-instate the Duel as a way to resolve disputes.

No more lawsuits, losers out of the gene pool, everybody wins.

Re: Grow up

- submitted by Anonymous on 10/09/2009

@ Jeff

"Are you serious?!? Only an idiot would think the answer to this is socialized medicine. I guess it's true...you can't fix stupid"

Since you are so hung up on "socialized", maybe you should petition to have your socialized fire and police services privatized. And in the meantime, as a sign of protest, you should stop using any socialized highways and don't flush that toilet, your sh*t will go into the commie sewers that your taxes pay for.

You are totally right about the last part of your statement though - "I guess it's true...you can't fix stupid".

WTF

- submitted by Anonymous on 10/09/2009

Seriously. How are people getting away with these kinds of lawsuits??? Hearing this kind of stuff gets my blood hotter than that cup of coffee these idiots spill all over themselves. This just makes no sense. I hope the judge throws this case in the garbage where it belongs. This woman is stupid, and if you're interested in reading about more stupid people (like me lol), check out morondailynews.com.

@HealthCare--Under

- submitted by slice on 10/09/2009

@HealthCare--Under socialized medicine the crack-headed woman wins without the trouble of going through a suit. She goes to the hospital and the coffee shop owner pays extra taxes his whole life to cover it. And don't think such a opportunist/professional victim would be appeased with merely occasional treatment either.

typical american

- submitted by Anonymous on 10/09/2009

so american

Remove them

- submitted by Anonymous on 10/09/2009

@above: Remove all the americans.

Maybe someone should sue the

- submitted by Anonymous on 10/09/2009

Maybe someone should sue the owner for insulting their intelligence. Seriously. Think about it...Customer A sues and gets a sign because they are an idiot. Customer B sues (not for money, just sue to remove the sign) because of the verbal harassment of the sign, wherein the sign is insulting Customer B's intelligence. The owner wouldn't even have to get a lawyer in case B because he would want to lose. Why want to lose? Because all he would have to do would be to remove the sign, AND the court would have officially upheld that the sign is a verbal harassment due to it being an insult on one's intelligence. Then when customer A's suit continues (AKA your story above) the federal court has already officially stated that Customer A is a moron and the owner's lawyers can use that against her in court! :)

Re: Healthcare

- submitted by Some Guy on 10/09/2009

Regardless of whether we had socialized health care here or not (which personally I don't want) the fact is people can sue here in the US for much more money than they need to cover whatever medical/other expenses they need to pay for. But the person in the "and about Canada" comment showed us that you can't do that in Canada. If only we had a law like that. So please, if you are going to try and defend your nationalized health care, don't use this story or others like it as an excuse. The reason people can sue like this in America doesn't have a lot to do with the health care costs as much as it has to do with the increasing selfish mindset in this country and elsewhere.

stupid coffee biatch

- submitted by Anonymous on 10/09/2009

you should TOTALLY sue the s**t out of her, dude! just take out an inordinately large lawsuit against her, the lawyers will meet and probably come to an agreement of some sort, it will cost her money, and she might not be such an irrational c**t in the future. SUE HER!!!!! she can see what it feels like on the other end. wanker biatch probably never had to be responsible for herself before, now's a good time for her to start.

...not that this strikes a chord with me or anything......:)

funny

- submitted by angryrat on 10/09/2009

America is supposed to be the place where you are responsible for yourself, where the state is not looking out for you, and should not help you out if you hit a rough spot, after all, personal responsibility is the all-time god, and down with the socialist nanny states of Europe... and then you can sue someone if you broke into their homes, and got locked into the garage for two weeks. Moreover you'd won. Not to mention spilling some coffee -on yourself. Sad.

Punitive Damages

- submitted by Anonymous on 10/09/2009

@anonymous: I don't know how it is in Canada, but one of the reasons punitive damages exist in the U.S. is that many large corporations can afford compensatory damages to plaintiffs as long as they're able to keep doing business as they wish. Also, assault and battery charges can be brought in criminal and civil court and, in some states, attorney's fees are recoverable (in the civil cases, I don't know much about criminal ones).

@ i can't believe judges don't

- submitted by Anonymous on 10/09/2009

there was a story a while back where something about like what you said happened. Paraphrasing it a 14 year old girl was texting and walked into an open man hole. They sued the city for a large amount ( not sure on exact numbers) and the guys who were working im sure were fired. now they had up the big orange construction cones around the man hole and stepped away to grab a tool and she, not paying attention walked right into it. there is a city ordinance they says you must have some type of barrier up when you have a man hole open but seriously if she would have been watching where she was going none of this would have happened. sometimes people just need to man up and take responsibility for their actions; she is blaming some one else for walking into a hole, how ridiculous is that?

only in america :) cheap

- submitted by John on 10/09/2009

only in america :)

<a href="http://cheap-refurbishedlaptops.blogspot.com/">cheap laptops</a>

solution

- submitted by Anonymousss on 10/09/2009

just put up a sign that say "wont serve unless you agree not to sue"

problem solved. they get their coffee, and by being served that coffee, agree not to sue.

everyone wins! even the people who will get a chuckle out of it every morning.

response

- submitted by Anonymous 2 on 10/09/2009

@anonymous

"but seriously if she would have been watching where she was going none of this would have happened."

True, but the workmen were still negligent - if she had been blind of partially sighted she still would have fallen in.

If you ever stepped in dog turd you'll know that you aren't always scanning the road ahead of you as you walk.

Actually, if she made

- submitted by Anonymous on 10/09/2009

Actually, if she made contact with you it's assault and battery, although I think assault merges into battery leaving it at just battery. Often with intentional torts the damages are both compensatory and punitive. You might have a claim against the women, either civil or criminal, regardless of the amount of injury you actually sustained.

Was she hot?

- submitted by Anonymous on 10/09/2009

Was she hot?

no case

- submitted by Anonymous on 10/09/2009

if there was witnesses including yoruself, as to what she was doing when she was pouring the coffee, she aint gonna win shit.

@i can't beleive judges don't

- submitted by Anonymous on 10/09/2009

Judges do dismiss suits like this. Almost always. This whole rant is awfully similar to what some people said about the woman who won a million dollar verdict from McDonald's when she was burned by hot coffee. The thing that people fail to mention about that case is that the woman had third degree burns over a significant portion of her body, including her groin. As it turns out, the employees had removed a device that was intended to regulate the temperature of the coffee, which resulted in it being served at near boiling temperatures, and no one expects to be served boiling coffee. Sure, she was negligent in the spill, but that was taken into account in the damages by reducing how much she received according to the percentage she was at fault.

McDonald's, and other restaurants, are now rather careful not to serve boiling coffee, so that woman suing for her injuries ended up making us all safer, as difficult as that might be to believe.

lawsuits

- submitted by KB on 10/09/2009

stupid shit like this pisses me off.. this woman gets a lawyer for something like this, but I can't get a lawyer to take our case, they say we have no case... My wife got attacked by our neighbors pitbull that they let roam free, the dog isn't registered and has never had shots for rabies etc... and they get a slap on the wrist, a warning of not to let it happen again and my wife gets to got through the series of rabies shots etc, whiel nothing happens to the owners... amazing..

mcdonalds

- submitted by Anonymous on 10/09/2009

Your friend never heard of the McDonald's lawsuit a few years ago? You know, the one where the lady spilled her coffee in the car got scalded and then got rich? I personally think it is ridiculous but you have to know these things these days. There is always some vile, scumbag attorney slithering around.

In my opinion, when a cafe

- submitted by Anonymous on 10/09/2009

In my opinion, when a cafe hands you a coffee, they have a duty of care to make sure they fix the lid properly. If you take the lid off yourself to add sugar etc, then it's your problem, but if the cafe is handing you a finished product, they better bloody well put the lid on PROPERLY.

My partner burned her lap because the lid was loosely attached to the top of her coffee. We didn't complain or sue etc coz we're not douchebags... but someone did because every time we go back there, the lids are on TIGHT.

Yes, ok, maybe it's prudent to check the lid yourself, but seriously, it doesn't take much for the cafe to do exactly that, and they're asking for it if they don't, because there ARE litigious idiots out there who sue at the drop of a hat.

Stupid Coffee Lady

- submitted by Anonymous on 10/09/2009

Chances are, its her own damn fault for doing a bunch of things at once while trying to put a lid on coffee. I wish the shop owner the best of luck and to keep fighting the good fight against morons like that. Of course hot coffee is hot! >_>;;

McDonald's

- submitted by Anonymous on 10/09/2009

The McDonald's case was not frivolous. Coffee is hot, you're right. The coffee from McDonald's was heated well beyond the standard temperature of coffee. Flesh was melted and fused together. That doesn't happen with hot coffee. You handle hot coffee one way and scalding, dangerous, flesh-melting coffee another way. Your argument is a little like treating lemon-ade the same as caustic HCl-ade.

by buying a cup of coffee

- submitted by Anonymous on 10/09/2009

by buying a cup of coffee from a business you are implicitly consenting to the risk of injury from that coffee. do we really need warning signs? i dont think anyone can say with a straight face that this woman, this coffee buyer/drinking, was unaware that the coffee WILL be hot. these people drive me crazy, as well as the lawyers that take these cases on knowing theyll get paid either way. its a lose/lose situation for the owner, but hopefully he can file an injunction against this woman for interfering with his business.

Calm down!

- submitted by stl_fox on 10/09/2009

There are so many poorly thought out, down right incorrect comments in this thread it's paralyzing.

Everyone needs to chill out!

The woman had her attorney send a settlement letter. This is not the same as a lawsuit. If the details of the story are correct then woman, technically, has not sued anyone. Yet. Nor does it mean it would even make it to court.

People send "threatening" legal letters to others all the time. 98% of the time nothing becomes of it. Anyone heard of RIAA?

It's amazing how quickly everyone jumps on the "American justice system is a joke" band-wagon.

Gimme a break. It's not a perfect system but its supreme court decisions are still used as a model for precedent in much of the world.

Finally, remember, there are imbeciles/asshats *everywhere*; not just in the US.

Idiot should never had

- submitted by Anonymous on 10/09/2009

Idiot should never had retained a lawyer in the first place, with a frivolous suit like this he would be better off simply speaking with a few customers (regulars) that were there at the time, saw her distracted by her phone and her child.

And they just laugh in the face of their lawyer, draw it out as long as humanly possible (every hour that lawyer spends dealing with her ass costs that woman a few hundred dollars) she'll either give up, or it'll get to court. At which point he summons his witnesses, they tell the judge she's a retard, and he walks away without spending tens of thousands on legal representation.

wow

- submitted by Anonymous on 10/09/2009

I hope someone throws scalding coffee in this whore's face.

Who told you to put the baum

- submitted by Anonymous on 10/10/2009

Who told you to put the baum on? Did I tell you to put the baum on?

"This shit doesn't happen in

- submitted by Anonymous on 10/10/2009

"This shit doesn't happen in Canada, because everyone's covered universally for healthcare."

Wow, that's retarded. America in general is a litigious society, not because we have private healthcare, but because we treat law suits like the lottery. People not only suit for medical costs, but also for emotional distress and punitive damages.

Emotional distress should not have a dollar value in the millions and punitive damages should not go to the person suing.

hilarious !!!

- submitted by Anonymous on 10/10/2009

America really is on the path to "Idiocracy"